One of the first things you'll see entering Kindy’s Christmas Factory Outlet in South Philadelphia

Kindy’s Christmas Factory Outlet has been taking over a warehouse just off the Schuylkill Expressway in South Philadelphia for over four decades.

An integral part of many holiday memories, the shop is the opposite of pretentious. Think shiny garlands, colorful lights, innumerable characters in green and red, every imaginable type of bow — it’s like a giant vision board for making your home as absurdly merry as possible.

Located at the site of a decommissioned Army depot, the store is an offshoot of Brite Star Manufacturing, a company that manufactures tinsel and other holiday decorations.

It’s only open for two months leading up to Christmas, and only Friday through Monday. Also, there’s no heat inside.

This Billy Penn reporter bundled up and headed out in search of festive decor. There was plenty of run-of-the-mill Christmas fare, but some of it’s hard to even process until after you leave. Offerings ran the gamut, from classic to gaudy to cheugy to “Wow, wish I was in the room when that product was designed, because lol wut?”

The (very) unassuming entrance to Kindy’s Christmas Factory Outlet in South Philadelphia Credit: Asha Prihar / Billy Penn

Kindy’s website says it’s open this Friday (and possibly Saturday, too), though the store’s automated phone message had a confusing message about closing the Monday before Christmas.

Whether you’re planning to go yourself or just want a feel for the vibe, check out this list of fun finds for $30 or less.

Reindeer cutouts that look like Bambi

$8.99

It’s giving classroom bulletin board. Ostensibly baby reindeer, these vintage-style characters mostly just look like Bambi.

Credit: Asha Prihar / Billy Penn

Ice Cream Claus

$13.99

An ice cream cone, but make it Santa?

Credit: Asha Prihar / Billy Penn

‘Rudolph unfriended me’

$4.99

An ornament for the 21st century. Or maybe just the early 2010s.

Credit: Asha Prihar / Billy Penn

Giant sparkle candy cane

$24.99

This four-foot shimmery candy cane is one of the first things you see when you walk into the store. Inescapable mood-setter for any holiday party.

Credit: Asha Prihar / Billy Penn

Birdhouse tree ornaments out the wazoo

$0.79

Might never have crossed your mind otherwise, but hanging a birdhouse in a (Christmas) tree makes a lot of sense.

Credit: Asha Prihar / Billy Penn

Light-up animals in costume

$26.49 or $26.99

A dachshund Santa or a pig Santa? Both inflatable props are a little unsettling, but the slightly cuter dog costs 50 cents more.

Credit: Asha Prihar / Billy Penn

Who says ornaments have to make sense

$0.79

A dog? A pinecone? A boot? A stocking? Whatever it is, it’s cute.

Credit: Asha Prihar / Billy Penn

5.5-foot foldable Santa

$15.99

This jointed cut-out offers the possibility of putting Santa in a Rocky pose. You need this in your house, stat.

Credit: Asha Prihar / Billy Penn

Fake fireplace

$9.99

This “realistic,” “easily assembled,” and “three dimensional” setup is apparently made of “sturdy fibreboard,” and it also comes with a “burning yule log inset” (made out of paper…). Is it meant to be a prop in a school play? Whatever, I just REALLY want to have it.

Credit: Asha Prihar / Billy Penn
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Asha Prihar

Asha Prihar is a general assignment reporter at Billy Penn. She has previously written for several daily newspapers across the Midwest, and she covered Pennsylvania state government and politics for The...