Mayoral candidate and former District Attorney Lynne Abraham released an internal poll Thursday showing that she holds a commanding lead in the race over perceived frontrunners Tony Williams and Jim Kenney.

So naturally, this afternoon, former PGW executive and candidate Doug Oliver released his own poll showing him with 60 percent of the vote and a header that reads “Results are not random or representative and likely inaccurate, but still show that Oliver leads the pack by ridiculous amounts in the 2015 Mayor’s race.”

Beneath the information detailing Oliver’s *huge* lead is context about a margin of error being plus/ minus 50 percent. It also went into a list of the people “polled” — Doug Oliver’s church, Doug Oliver’s college, Doug Oliver’s fraternity and Doug Oliver’s neighbors. He also is apparently “significantly better liked” than Kenney and Williams because he “offers ice cream to kids and puppies to the puppy-less.”

But seriously! Here’s the full document Oliver released:

Doug Oliver polling response